Tears
by Racoda Moonshine
Summary: Emotions are a lot stronger than people expect and if they want to be released, they will be. It just shocked Spock at how ruthless they could be.


**AN: Hiiiiiii, so this is my first Star Trek fic so don't go expecting the Holy Grail of writing, okay? ^^ **

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><p><strong><em><span>Tears<span>_**

_Seventy four._

Seventy four tears had fallen from his eyes since reaching his quarters.

Once the doors had slid shut, his emotions had overpowered him, taking vengeance for being locked away for so long. His body shook violently and every chocked sob burned in his throat. He stumbled towards his bed and fell upon it, sinking deep into the pillows as his body screamed out at him.

How could he have been so stupid?

Surely his Captain knew now, how could he not?

The Vulcan clenched his fists and curled himself into a ball. His whole life he had remained calm, collected and logical (apart from that incident when he was a child but that was hardly countable Spock thought) but then James T. Kirk had screeched into his life and ruined his self control.

Spock had found the human so…fascinating, infuriating and just simply illogical.

So how could it be that this one human being could read Spock like an open book when it had taken so many years for the Vulcan to bind himself shut?

Spock felt so small, like he was that half-human, half-Vulcan child back on his home planet looking up into his father's eyes and seeing nothing but disappointment.

Spock sat up, forcing himself to stand and finding that he instantly started to pace across the room.

_Ninety eight._

Ninety eight tears had fallen from his eyes and still he could not stop.

The Captain's shift ended in exactly three minutes and no doubt he would come to confront Spock.

That is one of the many things that Spock admired (liked? _Loved?_) about the human, his up front and honest nature meant that whatever the Captain thought, he usually said.

Spock sat on the edge of the bed, hunching over and holding his head in his hands. His head ached, thoughts and feelings buzzing in his head and they all had something to do with a certain man.

Then the door opened.

Spock didn't move, couldn't move.

Silence overtook once the door closed again.

Someone cleared their throat nervously.

Spock looked up, tears still wet on his face, knowing full well they would have been noticed whether or not he let them be.

The Captain (_his _Captain) was standing, arms outstretched waiting for someone to fill them.

The Vulcan hesitated. Jim's blue eyes shone with unshed tears, matching the shine that must have also adorned Spock's.

He was smiling, the smile reserved for only Spock.

The darkness in Spock's mind faded as he stood slowly, his tears forgotten memories.

**_T'hy'la._**

As arms enveloped Spock, all he could sense was Jim, his pain, his relief and his love all flowing into the Vulcan as they clung to each other.

Jim's embrace transported Spock home.

Back to his mother.

Back to safety and warmth.

Back to love.

"Spock, I'm so sorry, really I am." Jim's voice sounded small and muffled against Spock's shoulder. The Vulcan pulled back slightly, secretly glad that the Captain's arms stayed tightly around his waist.

"Captain," Spock paused, "Jim, there is no need for you to apologise."

Jim shook his head forcefully.

"I should have noticed, should have realised that…"

Jim trailed off as the Vulcan placed his fingertips to the other mans forehead.

/_Jim, I forgive you._/

The blonde haired man smiled as the smooth, steady voice resounded in his head.

/_I realise I am not one of your main priorities and for me to assume so would be illogical._/

Jim hitched his head forward and sealed his lips over Spock's, moving his hands from the other mans hips to come up and cup Spock's face tenderly.

Spock tensed at first before thrusting his hands up into golden locks, pushing the humans lips more firmly onto his own. Jim pulled back but kept his hands in place, feeling Spock's very essence flow through him.

/_Spock, I will take incredible offense if next time, you don't assume that you're the single most important priority in my life, got it?_/

Spock's smile quivered upon his lips before his final barriers broke and he felt it stretch out across his face.

/_Yes Jim, I understand._/

Jim chuckled at the sparkle in Spock's eyes as he leant forward again.

/_Now kiss me Mr. Spock, that's an order._/

Spock could feel the shiver that ran up his spine as Jim combed his fingers through the Vulcan's jet black hair.

/_As you wish Captain._/

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><p><strong><em>So...whaddya think? ^^ x<em>**


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